All the While by Gina Azzi

Author:Gina Azzi [Azzi, Gina]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Amazon: B01M8MGHMT
Publisher: Gina Azzi
Published: 2017-01-17T00:00:00+00:00

* * *

It’s not until four days later that I realize I’m late. And I’m never late.

I tap my fingertips nervously against the toilet paper roll. Shit. Could I be pregnant? The test offers results five days before a missed period. I’m three days late.

Oh God. How could I let this happen?

I stare at the poster on the back of the metal bathroom door. An inspirational quote. Really?

Fear has two meanings: Forget everything and run. Face everything and rise.

Jesus, how I want to run. Like a fucking cheetah.

I open the test packet with my teeth and take a deep breath. The bathroom is quiet save for the spontaneous drip from a leaky faucet. Uncapping the test, I say a silent prayer to the universe that I’m not pregnant. Then I pee for the obligatory five seconds, recap the test, and lay it faceup.

6:52 PM

The longest three minutes of my life stretch on forever.

Willing myself not to peek, I stare at my phone urging the seconds to tick by faster. What do I do if I’m pregnant? I’ve always been careful. Always. Fuck. I wouldn’t even know who the father is. Married man? No, he was too long ago. Hector? Jesus, please not Hector. The random from the club? I don’t even remember his name! God, did I ever know it in the first place?

6:53 PM

I did this to myself. I deserve to be punished.

But is a baby really a punishment?

Would I keep it?

Could I not keep it?

My baby is not an it!

Oh God, I want the three minutes to end.

6:54 PM

Exhale deeply. Everything is going to be okay Maura.

I pick up the test. My fingers shake lightly. And there, staring up at me, remarkably bold and unmistakably pink are two straight lines.

I’m fucking pregnant.

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